Shavige Bath – My Nemesis

First, I felt being lifted by someone (probably my husband), I was carried away to some strange place. After that, I came back to my own bed, my husband turned into a black thing, it was hovering around my head, definitely not a fairy, and then, there were these words and sentences which made no sense, swirling around in my brain and the black thing which resembled some kind of an animal was stealing those sentences from my brain with Harry Potter’s wand.  I opened my mouth to shout but there wasn’t any sound. I was sure all this was not happening to me for real when the ghost told me, “You cannot cook Shavige Bath!”

I drifted back to sleep and in the morning, I texted my husband, “Someone has done black magic on me. How can the ghost know about my inability to cook Shavige Bath? Unless ghosts and fairies are friends, where do they live, by the way?” In response, all I got was, “HMMM”. My husband has developed immunity towards my cooking and the bizarre ways my brain functions.

This happened many days after the day I decided I will never cook Shavige Bath again. I was in one of those rare forms in cooking only comparable to Virat Kohli’s batting form. I began to follow cookery shows, jot down recipes and even manage the groceries! And in one such show, I saw that when you use only half a green chilli, you need to put the exposed part in a bowl of salt – that will keep it from going bad.

I obviously took this too far; I had got a few green chillies from the store. Some of them were a little off in the ends; I cut all of them in half and put them in a bowl of salt. I kept them for days, every day I would look at them be so happy at the way I am learning, growing, experimenting, and cooking!

In all the happiness that was bursting, I decided I have to make shavige bath. I cut those chillies and while cutting them, I touched my left cheek and didn’t realize it for a while. I went on with sautéing the onions and chillies when my cheek started to burn a lot, I washed my face and came back. The burning didn’t stop! Absent minded, and in a lot of pain, I put the same salt that the chillies were in and I did put more than I usually did. I somehow managed to put the shavige in and it cooked pretty well.

My cheek started burning more. I served some shavige bath and started eating it. The salt in the chillies had intensified so much that it had made the shavige hot and too salty.  There was so much of salt and it was so hot that now my cheeks and my mouth burned!

I immediately did what a sane person would do. Stop eating and call Mom. She told me to put ice on my cheek. Ah, ice. What a relief it was! That’s when I took the oath of “No Going near Shavige Bath”. Now, I don’t even maintain direct eye contact with a Shavige packet. Wait, that squirrel on the packet was the GHOST!

 

 

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